You Literally Have to Commit to Change to Manage Anger

by : abs9360

If you are angry and you know it, raise your hand

Anger is not all bad; it is how one expresses it that spells the difference. Managing anger is important especially if one has the tendency to lose control over situations big or small.

The following are basic tips and advice to help you be comfortable with your anger, and being able to express it in a manner that is not hurtful towards others or yourself.

Know what you are angry at

First things first, how would you get to manage the anger that seems to broil deep down inside you when you have no clear idea as to the situations, matters that trigger them in the first place?

It is important therefore that you identify any attitudes that you have which predispose you to a host of reactions.

Do you not like it when the waiter takes about ten minutes to give you your regular order? Or what would your reaction be if the cashier in your local 7-11 store punches the wrong keys and you end up short changed.

Do you vent? Do you rave? Do you feel you want to punch someone or at least scream at their face?

Fortunately or unfortunately, you are not alone. If it is these triggers that set you off, then you have at least made that significant first step of becoming aware of your feelings and your reactions.
Knowing and having identified what makes you angry make it a lot easier to deal with when they erupt. You also could get to see how your past reactions were in order to gauge or determine how your current reaction would be, now that you know a bit better.

Past is past, let them go

Most of us carry a litany of conditioned responses and go through life using those to deal with every blow that comes our way. Usually, these responses were those left over from childhood.

Remember when you were crying and a grown-up caregiver - your parents, aunts or relatives, told you it is bad to be angry? And so you kept it all inside you until you grew up. As an adult, this then gets manifested as denial and fear of truly expressing what you feel.

Being aware of such past conditioned behavior actually frees you from its clutches. By bringing the feelings to the fore of your attention, you then get to deal with them and eventually use them to not be as impediments to your personal growth.

Anger needs to be acknowledged as it is there. Anger that is suppressed is not healthy and if it is not appropriately dealt with could lead to it exploding unnecessarily later on.