Funny Chocolate |
Ever wondered what life would be like without chocolate. I'm sure if you're a chocolate lover like me, such a concept would be unthinkable. Who would dare suggest such a thing. Ok, it was just a thought, in a moment of madness. Well actually, it was more than just a moment, during which time, I wore the shoes of a slightly disturbed chocoholic (only slightly), and probably for slightly longer than I should have. While wearing those shoes, I had these thoughts. Please don't quote me on them: In the beginning, there was the word...and the word was Xocalati There are three important things in life: Love, chocolate,...and..er...and remembering to buy chocolate. Last week, I saw a swimming pool full of chocolate liquor; and as usual, I had to go and put my foot in it... (well actually, it was both feet). We were the first to build a house completely from chocolate. Two months later, here we are; homeless, (but not hungry). If chocolates and flowers are the way to a girl's heart, then why the hell do they not make chocolate flowers? Two chocolate chips were sitting on a freshly baked cookie. One looked up at the sky and said, "it's nice here, isn't it?" The other replied, "no, I'd much rather be in a bar." Susan asked Mary, "so what would you do if I took all that chocolate away?" Mary replied, "so what would you do if you had to carry all that chocolate, without any legs?" "At the end of the day, people are all the same, we all want and need the same things, don't we?" "Huh... speak for yourself dude!" I had a 'near death' experience, and I saw the light, and the light was leading me into a shiny brown, and the shiny brown was surrounded by, what looked like almonds. Money is everything. You can't get chocolate without it. "I just don't know what you see in that man, after all, he's just a candy store worker." Obviously, the person that said, "music is the food of life," never tasted it. I have become an optimist. The larder isn't half empty, It just has more space for...chocolate... things.... They say that chocolate gives you a boost of energy. I bought all this chocolate because I'm planning to run a marathon. Sometime soon... Honestly... "I would run a million miles just to be by your side... The chocolate side of course, not the wafer side." "You asked me where I expected to be in three years time. But before I answer the question, I must first ask, where will the chocolate be?" "So what if I do have a chip on my shoulder? You should see what I have in my pockets." "My son, friends will come, friends will go. But chocolate doesn't have legs." In the cold light of day, chocolate tastes just right. If you were in my shoes, you'd have very sticky feet. If faith really can move a mountain, then why couldn't she carry a bigger box of chocolates when she visited yesterday? Tomorrow's another day. "Oh dear, back to the shops again." Who would have thought that chocolate could become so popular, without being featured on a reality TV show. Well, now you have heard my thoughts. If I have anymore I will let you know. Stay sweet, my chocolate love, and one day we will melt into one; and you can have my nuts.
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