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The world is a dangerous place; it is NOT the same place where we grew up. Here are some chilling facts: * If you live in the suburbs, a pedophile or registered sex offender probably lives within one mile of your family. If you live in an urban environment, the pedophile lives much closer. There is a high probability that a pedophile is within one mile of your child at all times. * One in three women and one in four men will become the victim of violent crime in his or her lifetime. * 73% of violent crime occurs within five miles of the victim's home. * A robbery occurs every 59 seconds. * A rape occurs every six minutes. * One out of every 100 households will have an automobile stolen and 2% of them will be by carjacking. * More than 35,000 children are forcibly abducted each year. * One in 12 women is stalked at some time in her life. Last year, nearly 1,007,000 women were stalked. * 80% of all restraining orders attained against stalkers are violated. Given these statistics it is critical that we safeguard our children and families against harm. From an early age children of course need to be taught basic safety information such as their full name, address, phone number and parent cell phone. They also need some information that parents twenty years ago did not need. Most parents have not earned a black belt; even fewer are martial arts instructors. Parents still have an obligation to prepare their children to face the potential dangers that lurk outside of the home, and that are creeping into the home via the internet. Parents must know the basics of self-defense and how to teach self-defense to children. Kids should learn the "red flags" that signify an inappropriate conversation or a potentially dangerous encounter. * For example, have you told your child that adults never ask children for help? If an adult asks your child for help, she needs to know that is a warning to run away. * Does your child know how to make a scene? Have you taught her to yell and scream, kick, scratch, bite, and strike at the body's vulnerable spots? * Have you assured her that you will not get mad at her if she yells, “Get away from me!", if she feels threatened by a stranger? * Is your child aware that other children can be predators? Child on child molestation is one the most common forms of molestation. Children who have been abused by an adult will often go from victim to abuser. * Does your child know how to listen to that inner voice that says something is amiss, and get away quickly? * If a family member or family friend touches your child inappropriately does your child know that she should speak up and speak up loudly? Is your child comfortable speaking with you? * Does your child know that you would rather have an embarrassing misunderstanding with an adult than have your child feel uncomfortable around that adult? Parents would rather hear, “Get away from me you creep!" than “I let him touch me because I was being polite and I didn’t want to offend him." * If your child is separated from you does she know to immediately latch on to the nearest mother with children and ask for help? Teach your kids street smarts, and how to remain alert and tuned-in to their surroundings. Don't be in denial. Thirty years ago it was safe to walk home from school, to the local YMCA or to a friend’s house. It was safe for four-year olds to play in the yard or ride a bike down the side walk. Not today. Preparing children for what they will hopefully never encounter is a gift. There are simple ways to empower children and give them the tools they need to stay safe. A family’s best line of defense is education. Purchasing a family self-defense kit is a way for the whole family to learn basic self-defense together. Enrolling your kids in a martial arts school further teaches survival skills and builds self-confidence; most martial arts instructors are very careful not to give children a false sense of security. Instructors instead stress the message that children can’t overpower adults, but can make a scene and get the attention of adults nearby. Establish an on-going dialogue with your children about safety. Let your children practice yelling, “NO!" Give your children a voice. Create an atmosphere of trust that allows children to come to you if they are feeling uncomfortable. Be your child’s advocate, this means keeping your eyes and ears open to possible dangerous situations. Face uncomfortable situations head-on, without shame and make sure to use clear language. Listen to your inner voice; it alerts you when you face a potentially threatening situation. Time and time again when people are interviewed after an encounter with a predator they say that they knew something was wrong, if only they had listened to that little voice saying, “Get away!" If a coach, neighbor, teacher, family member etc. seems creepy, LISTEN!!!!! The message here is not to live in terror, worrying that every stranger is a predator and that danger lurks around every corner. Parents certainly do not want to rob their children of their innocence or give them free floating anxiety. The point is that by equipping the family with knowledge and teaching the skills necessary to assess and react appropriately to danger, families take back their power. Giving children a voice and some skills stacks the deck in their favor. The knowledge that children are prepared in turn gives parents piece of mind. |
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